Saturday, April 16, 2011

You Talk Too Much

A few weeks ago I went to a church fundraiser dinner in St. George. My grandmother invited me.  They had long banquet tables and I was there with my kids by myself.  She saved us seats on one side of the table. Therefore, I sat across the table from another mother and her two girls.  She introduced herself as Jamie. We exchanged some small talk and then crickets.  So, I decided to try to get her to talk about something. I asked about her husband and she curtly told me that she was not married. Oops.  But I was not going to feel bad about that. I did not think it was an offensive question. I asked her about work.  Her reply was that she does odd jobs.  Crickets. This same trend repeated for several minutes. I tried everything I could think of to get her to break out of her monosyllabisms (I don't think that is a word, but maybe it should be). Nothing. Crickets. There had to be something interesting about this lady.  But after several gallant tries, I decided that there really was nothing interesting at all.

Or maybe it is me! Maybe I just talk too much. I know I am weird and I have always thought that I talk too much.  Like yesterday at the park. Here I am with three new women in Reno.  I am trying to get to know them and find something we can talk about. It is not that I want to do all the talking, but sometimes you have got to plunge in, right?  After being there for 3 hours and much to their chagrin, I am sure, I started talking about the book I just finished reading, "Roots" by Alex Haley. I went on and on about it and what I thought about it and how it affected me.  I must have talked for ten minutes straight about this or that aspect of the book. 

They all just stared at me.

I think I am reminding myself of my friend Melanie. The first week I met her it was the summertime in Las Vegas. It was miserable hot and she was miserably very pregnant.  I met her on Sunday and invited her to come to my house the next day. She didn't know anyone. She came every day that week.  And she talked and talked and talked.  After several days I thought to myself, "Wow, I thought I was a big talker!"  Then I realized that she probably doesn't really talk this much. She just needed to get it all out of her system.  We are still really close friends and her and I never seem to run out of things to talk about when we get together. That is pretty cool. 

I think I am having the same problem right now.  Here I am in a new city. I only know a couple of people and I have been cooped up with my kids for about a month.  My husband works a lot.  I have no one to talk to, and unfortunately for those three ladies, I had to get some of it out of my system.

And if I can't find anyone interesting to talk to, I can always go talk to the crickets. I am sure the crickets have more to say than Jamie.


EdgyK said...

Ha ha you make me laugh. I am not a big talker in general but when I meet new people I feel like I just can't stop. I don't know what comes over me.

Meridy said...

I appreciate people like you. I don't always know what to talk about and I it is so nice to talk with someone who can guide the conversation. If you had talked to me about Roots I'm sure I could have come up with something to ask you about it.

Sometimes you do have to take the plunge because other people won't do it.

Melanie said...

Ok, you and I have to get better cell phone coverage so we can talk more.

I've got no one here either.

Hoku said...

Hahaha! You never cease to amaze me with how often you take the kids out... BY YOURSELF! And I think you talk "just right." ;) Some people just haven't learned how to carry a conversation. There was one girl in our ward who visit taught me and I (cruelly, I suppose after hearing your perspective) would purposely leave the awkward silences until she thought of something. And Tamahere will sometimes interject, "Awkwaaarrrrdddd," at annoying moments. He can be such a doofus.

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