A Moment In Time

I thought I would get a few snapshots of the little ones. When I put Julia up there, she took the ribbon that Harry was not interested in.  All of a sudden, he HAD to have it! Notice her coy little smile as she uses her body to box him out. This girl knows just what to do.

Then they started sharing the ribbon...how cute.

Right after this, Julia got really mad at Harry because she wanted the ribbon back, naturally. What's a girl to do? Give him a big shove, of course.  I caught him just in time, before he did a face-plant on the ground.

Afterwards, Eli wanted to join in our little photo shoot. They are quite the trio.

Timing

My children have the most amazing timing...like, ever.

We sit down to eat dinner and I ask them, "So, how was your day?  What is going on? Tell me something?"

Answers are usually monosyllabic.  

But when the phone rings and I am talking to someone, then it becomes the perfect time to tell me about some amazing thing they have done.  Or when I am taking a shower, it is just when I need to give a kid permission to play the computer or get a phone number for someone they want to call.  And when I am trying to do a difficult yoga balance move that requires all of my concentration, that is exactly when they need to tell me what dastardly thing one of their siblings has done the day before. Or it is when they need a drink of water, or a puzzle from the top shelf, or cheese, or a cookie, or a pickle...oh you get the idea.

Like I said, their timing is always impeccable. Maybe that is why they are all going to be professional musicians someday....it is the perfect timing, of course.

Children's Choir Performance

I have been able to keep a Christmas tradition going one more year.  Today we did a musical program at a retirement community. It went really well. This year I took my children's choir from the Galena Ward to The Fountains.  It is a little retirement home near the airport. It really worked out perfectly and I am grateful for the experience.  

My choir member include Mateo, Porter, Soffia, Tessa, Summer, Aubrey, Bryce, Evva, Ella, Annika, Brady, Ryker, Anna, Derrick, Ruthie, Lena, Kaleigh, Olivia, Lily, Aryelle, Kennadee, Zach, and Raef.  My pianist is a young woman, Anna K., who has been such a blessing for the choir. Her family moved in a couple of months ago.

For the program, the kids sang "See the Joy", "Christmas Bells", "Teach Me To Walk/Love is Spoken Here", "That First Nowell", "Away In a Manger", and "Peaceful, Silent Night".  I also had some individual performances. Raef and Zach played three songs from Christmas Kaleidoscope. Tessa and Summer B. did a beautiful rendition of "A Special Night". I sang "Star of Bethlehem" and Anna L. did an adorable version of "Mary's Lullaby".

The last song was "Peaceful, Silent Night" and Kennadee C. sang "Silent Night", with the choir singing a different part. Then the two parts were put together and it was just lovely.

Rinar was able to participate because he accompanied on the solo parts, so it really was a family affair.

Someday we will be able to share this tradition with all of our kids when they are old enough. I look forward to it.  The residents enjoyed the show and all of the kids visited with them afterwards. 

Music is the perfect way to get the Christmas spirit. 

Me and Molly

Someone came over to our house last night! Surprise!  Our cute neighbors needed some sugar for a dessert they were making.  It was about 8pm and I was so excited. Someone came to our house.  Grant it, it was only 3 minutes, but still.

I thought about it this morning, and I can't help but remember one of my favorite musicals as a kid, "The Unsinkable Molly Brown". Did you ever see that movie?

Molly and her husband are a couple of country folk that discover gold and strike it rich. They move to Denver and buy this massively large house. The only problem is that the neighbors are snobs and no one ever comes to visit them, so they are so lonely. They ended up crashing the neighbors party next door.

"Howdy!" "Hi, there!" "Evening to y'all."

Oh, you get the picture.

I can't help but think of the Browns when I look at our situation.  We live in this huge house and we never get any visitors.  It is news worthy when we do. We just live so far away. I feel like my relationship with Molly Brown has gone to such a deeper level now.

Maybe I will go with her to France and learn some French.

Picking a Career

Rinar took the boys to a baptism today. As they were driving there, an interesting conversation ensued...

Zach: Dad, how many jobs can someone have and still make it home for dinner everyday?

Rinar: One

Zach: Darn, because I want to be an astronaut, inventor, doctor, and a chef.

Raef: Zach, you definitely won't be home for dinner if you are an astronaut.  You'll be in space for months!

I Miss My Ward Family

Some days are tougher than others. This was just one of those days. We had our ward Christmas party tonight. It was at the Stake Center, which is only about 20 miles away from our house. I was rushing to get out and all of my kids were being unresponsive, uncooperative, and incessantly whiny.  By the time I got in the car, my blood pressure was really high, my heart was racing and I just had to inhale and exhale.

When we pulled up to the church, Eli had fallen asleep. He completely zonked out. I took the twins inside and Rinar held Eli.  They had a creche display in one of the rooms. Both Harry and Julia insisted on touching the displays. I kept telling them no, but to no avail. They would not listen. So I pretty much lost it. I grabbed them both and dragged them out of the room.  I pretty much threw Harry on the ground.  I just couldn't deal with it anymore.

Rinar took them away, and I ended up holding Eli on the couch in the lobby while he slumbered away. While I was sitting there, I started to watch the ward members walking by, talking, visiting.  I felt so isolated and utterly alone. Here are all of these people. I have been in the ward for over 8 months, and I know no one.  Then I laid Eli on the couch and stood at the door to keep my eye on him and to watch the festivities.  Lots of people chatting and talking and it is always the same people paired up with each other.  I can just tell you who will be sitting with who talking and visiting.  I started to get very depressed.  

Can I be honest here? I really miss my Sunset Ward family.  They were always so sensitive to new people. You always made sure to sit with the new people, talk to them, really get to know them.

This ward is "friendly". Lots of smiles, and "Hi, how are yous?"  That is pretty much it. No one knows me. Okay, I can't say no one, but the list is incredibly small. People in this ward are just very comfortable where they are and there is no effort to really reach out to new people in a heart-felt way.  It was just so different in my last ward.  It truly was a family. This is very hard for me.  It is almost unbearable.

But then I sit here and think to myself...it must be me. What kind of vibes am I sending out?  Why do people talk to me the way that they do?  It kind of reminds me of my high school experience all over again.  I mean that in the sense that I had lots and lots of acquaintances, even a few fairly good friends, but I was so lonely. I had no real friends, where someone knew who I really was. It was hard, very hard. I was so alone.  But I am guilty. I have not really made as much of an effort as I did in Las Vegas.  I think that after many interactions, I have just become discouraged. We did invite a slew of people over for dinner to try to find our place in this ward, but it just hasn't gone how I hoped it would. Some people reciprocated an invite, but it felt like an obligation.

These are my feelings. I am probably being overly dramatic here, but at this moment, it is where my head is. This feels like a burden even more so, because we live so far away, on the fringe of the ward boundary. It is a huge inconvenience for anyone to come here. Whenever I tell people where I live, they give an audible sigh or groan.  Let's just say, we have had very few visitors for our entire stay in Reno. I think that in the 6 months we have lived in this house, we have had the same amount of visitors as we did in a two week time span in Las Vegas.

I actually started to feel nauseous at the Christmas party, so we left early. I just couldn't keep my feelings in check without making a spectacle of myself.

What I Didn't Eat

It was a small victory today, but I am going to celebrate.  I went to a ladies night dessert thing at Mandy's house. I drank bottled water, I carefully selected one small desert, ate a lot of fruit and dipped only a handful into some healthy dark chocolate. 

I am usually the girl that has one of each dessert.  But I decided I didn't want to be that way, and I wasn't.  Will it always be so? Probably not, but at least I have something I can build on.  Each time I am successful, I get a little bit stronger. Plus, I have been trying to reprogram my thinking a bit.  I mean, I have eaten all of the goodies before. I know what they taste like. I know how I feel after I indulge too much.  I can remember the good tastes, and avoid the yuckiness that follows.

I really want to get rid of the baby gut I have been carrying around as a result of two consecutive pregnancies.  I know I am never going to have washboard abs, but I know that I can do better. I am just hoping I can make it through this holiday season relatively unscathed.

I am just going to do my very best, and I will be happy with it. The small things really do add up.